I have nothing to write today. The only note written throughout the past two weeks is the concrete reminder that without Him, I am nothing but a broken well of bitter gall. This post is a testament to that.
“He who calls you is faithful, who will also do it.”
– 1 Thessalonians 5:24 –
“This hope will not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.”
– Romans 5:5 –
I was challenged by my devotional this morning to truly ponder why I have hope during different times of my life. At the moment, I am in a place where unanswered questions serve as a brutal alarm clock ringing like cymbals in my ears each morning. Daily the same queries are brought before the Lord, ones of “why,” and “when,” and “for how long, oh God?” I am so grateful He is a Father who doesn’t get frustrated with my unending need to be reminded! Today the answer was the verses above. He will take care of it. He is working on it. He will solve that which is beyond my human scope of ability.
“The Lord guards the inexperienced; I was helpless, and He saved me.”
– Psalm 116:6 –
So I swallow my pride and I wait. With each breath I force these electric bones to be still. At twenty years old, I am growing increasingly cognoscente of my own inexperience. Things like overcooked pasta-mush for dinner faithfully remind me of this. But He promises to guard me, so I lean on that. That is the reason for the hope I have: I am capable of nothing, and so He carries me.
I am nothing but a contentious woman seeking fame without Him. When laid at His feet, though, He takes this bumbling mess of a ragamuffin into His arms and continues on with His purpose. My questions don’t weary Him, however repetitive. My bare feet blackened from walking in the dirt and even my constant coffee breath are nothing to Him. All He sees is the creature He fashioned for His Kingdom’s glory. There is nothing left to prove.
“Arise, my darling. Come away, my beautiful one. For now the winter is past; the rain has ended and gone away. The blossoms appear in the countryside. The time of singing has come, and the turtledove’s cooing is heard in our land.”
– Song of Solomon 2:11 -12 –
Until next time,