October in Brockway.

Tomorrow October kisses Miami again. Or, some version of that given that this, in fact, Miami. But a girl can pretend.

As I write this, I’m sitting in my favorite spot at my favorite library in my favorite October sweater. I’m good at pretending. The moment, however, my feet step beyond the door to this haven of written worlds, realities fire will assault these bones once more. One can only pretend for so long.

At this point, I’ve shared a fair bit about what God was doing at this time last year, this time two years ago, and so on. So today I’m going to talk about His continual whisper over this next season.

“I am Yaweh, that is My name;
I will not give My glory to another
or My praise to idols.
The past events have indeed happened.
Now I declare new events;
I announce them to you before they occur.”
Isaiah 42:8-9

The past, beautiful as it was, was full of confusion, pain, rejoicing, hope, and mystery. This new season remains at times as hidden as autumn’s dawning in Florida. With both, however, for those who look, there are hints. A change in the wind. A few more leaves on the ground. Pumpkin patches being formed in the ninety-degree heat. Softer evenings with more frequent breezes. Thunder’s hymn. Likewise, the wind has changed spiritually, I feel. A few more friends around, this time deeper, with a common purpose. Peace in the midst of ministry’s chaos. Gentler setbacks with more permanent resolutions. Laughter’s rumble.

It’s time to rest. The work isn’t slowing down, nor will it ever. But it’s time to rest, to rejoice in the pockets between the chaos. Whatever pains remain, He has chosen for the sake of some future purpose. Everything is preparation for something else. The past is what it was, but things are about to change for the better. If you look, you’ll see it.

Until next time,

XOXO

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A Collection

Citizen

There is joy beyond
The paper walls of fear
They scream I’m stuck here, when,
The strife is over

Dwelling now in the dawn
I’ll never again dread the night
For I am Yours
And You are mine

 

Kathmandu

We were walking
Down flights of stair
Into the unknown
I hear their laugh
I feel their footsteps
The worst was over
The rails were blue

Now I’ve come to become
Myself anew
The thunderstorm has passed
Can you taste the dew?

 

Reep

What to do, who to be?
I’d lost myself, you see
Now we’re discovering
That all worth something
Lies in the land
Beyond the sea

 

 

 

Cultivating an Others-Focused Mentality

I’m beginning to realize the currency of community as a topic in my life right now. Perhaps it’s because isolation is such an eminent tool of the enemy’s. If we’re not isolated, he pits our emotions and PMS against us to make us think we are. Gradually that declines into self-awareness, then self-pity, and finally self-absorption until we have become so focused on our navels we truly are isolated because no one can stand to be around us and the ever interesting lint in our belly buttons.

Please hear me, I write this from the stance of being painfully aware of my own navel-syndrome. With the wedding (and thus marriage) coming ever closer, my voice is like nails on a chalkboard even to my own ears sometimes. But this is something we all battle. Where is the line between sharing and being open and intimate with a sister and becoming that one friend who never shuts up about her cat?

And then He whispers, abide. Even when striving to be an attentive listener, it can still so quickly become about us. However, when our mentality is no longer that of “Am I being a faithful enough friend, minister, sister, coworker, wife, daughter, etc,” but instead becomes “Lord, who would You have me bless today? Please equip me in the moment to do so in the way they are most needing,” breathing room opens up for us, striving ceases, and He is free to work through us however He sees best. Because like I said in my last post, it is not about us. It is never about us. It can’t be, because the moment it does our own nothingness and disparity floods like a Miami downpour. Once we’ve opened ourselves up to His leading, He is free to take the reins, whether that means sharing with so-and-so about our cat or listening to them talk for an hour about their own. Whatever it is, He will guide us. It simply takes getting our eyes off ourself and back onto Him.